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Hi! My name is Jackie and today I had to crab-walk in a hallway while singing Queen's 'Bicycle Race.' Also, I am clearly not a trend-setter, I am a trend-follower. I apologize for this, but only lightly.

I do this with the intention of going back and hitting up the intro post like a good person.

CHARACTER NAME: Julian Montague (Julie, Jules, etc. All are acceptable. Won't put up any argument.)
AGE: 25
HOUSE/YEAR/SPECIAL ROLES: Castelobruxo, 2012-2014 → THEN Hufflepuff, 2014-2019
WHAT'S SOME COMMON KNOWLEDGE ABOUT THEM?:

His dad's family didn't end up being war criminals. But, y'know, casually. In that they were not present to be war criminals.
Absolutely pretended not to comprehend the English language when he first arrived at Hogwarts. Feels no shame about this.
Works in a retirement home where he is bullied by people's grandparents/senior citizens who aren't anybody's grandparents daily. (Is the name of this retirement home based on the RED (Retired Extremely Dangerous) Movies/Comic? Yes. Has Ethel probably killed a man? Also yes.)

ELEVATOR PITCH: Big, quiet, blunt instrument would prefer it if
EMPLOYMENT HISTORY: The Reddington Elders Development (aka The RED), 2019-NOW
NOTABLE RELATIONSHIPS: Not? Really?? Bunches of 2019 Hufflepuffs, I guess! Possibly your grandma.
WANTED LINES:

I'm so bad at these because all I want to do is write: 'Friends??? Maybe????' a bunch.
People he's irritated by answering questions like he is also over the age of 80 and legally allowed to have no regard for social protocols. (Did you mess up your eyeliner? Yes. Yes, you did.)
I'm so tired, but please know that I love and appreciate all of you and will actually attempt to hit up the actual intro post after I am free from school tomorrow.

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Hello! I'm Julia and I have Louis Weasley, who is 18 and a former Puff. ♥

ahh jackie hi :o :o ♥ JULIAN IS GOOD also this is k
probably um! most relevant is my baby

sugarsyrup who was a hufflepuff in the year below his???

Edited (i can't html) 2021-02-11 00:16 (UTC)

OOOHHH look at me I'm Jackie I actually intend to go bad and do the intro post for extra credit

Edited (nah we live in the NOW) 2021-02-11 00:18 (UTC)

i want to be a good person, cheryl. it's my new years resolution. (it is not. i only resolve to eat more cheddar stax chips.)

For some reason I got as far as "i only resolve to eat more ch" and for some reason just assumed the rest of the word was gonna be "children" so idk what that says about me

HELLO! he is not, he is an idiot. but that's okay. we're all (not) doing our best.

also good god she's adorable? and sweet. and he will be unable to be rude to her. but they've probably been in the same place long enough that this has stopped plaguing him and he just likes her like a normal person.

i mean, i DO have access to children.

(i regret typing that.)

hello, nice to meet you!

high-five on not really caring about quidditch! sports ... do nothing for julian in general, but then he probably hasn't bothered thinking about non-magical sports. also, he has a good and very interesting job, he wants to hear about animals.

look. we here. n that's what matters

she's extremely stupid but
probably a good buddy i think
<': progress julian

I gotta believe every child eating witch started off as a mildly curious person with access to children

i just need access to a house in the woods.

Edited 2021-02-11 00:40 (UTC)

it's going great, i'm very proud.

growing as a person~ but spiritually and not vertically.

You gotta build it outta candy

i need an architecture degree with a specialization in candy-based construction.

I think I've seen this show on the food network

still not as good as halloween wars.

god I love that show????

I KNOW. it's the only thing television has done right.

hiii!!! it's ali!!!

i have a good bad hufflepuff '19 girl still bakin in the oven right now who will have more relevant lines to offer than my others

lorcan (this journal) is 20 and was ravenclaw '24. he is probably the least relevant line-wise but also the most likely to find julian a delight. he loves to ask questions but also loves a too-honest response.

noel (

noelnoel) is a lil closer in age at 24, gryffindor '21. he is a gullible idiot and absolutely did believe julian when he pretended not to know english.

lastly i have maya (

horsie), 28 and slytherin '17. i don't know about her!!! she was undeservedly the head girl in the same way Known Bully James Potter (I) got to be head boy just because he was popular and cleaned up his act in the 11th hour. one good thing she did for the school was found equestrian club because her parents threw fat stacks around to get a nice stable built.

Hiiiiii it’s lyss and I get that song stuck in my head nigh constantly

I’m appin a nineteener but the rest of mine are unfort babies
Aster is closest as a gryff 22 grad and she is from a promise we’re not war criminals home whose grandparents flew off to Europe for No Reason so she sorta gets that life and often terrorizes her elders.(So like, Julian, not his delightful charges.)

He might be exempt from Lysander

humansuit ‘s attentions and he should feel grateful because he’s dumb

HELLO HELLO!

hell yeah, bake me a hufflepuff. make this class better and also worse, but with sprinkles!

julian doesn't find himself to be a delight. but lorcan can speak to ethel. who agrees with him. and spends 8 hours a day attempting to get julian to carry her around like cleopatra.

noel, you're a good boy. they would've been sorted in the same year ... if i can do math?? (doubtful. very doubtful.) so julian would've been full-swing on his 'i refuse to speak the english language lest someone think i comprehend it' at that point.

god, good for her. friggin' get those financial perks.

HELLO! gettin' in on all that awful energy going on here.

also: two thumbs up for 'whoops, there was a WAR???? OH MY HOW AWFUL! WHO COULD'VE KNOWN. so sad. so tragic. we mourn etc.' julian deserves to be terrorized. he's primed and ready for it.

lysander you deserve better. this is good for you.

JACKIE HI!!!! IT'S ALEX!!!!! i already have four (we all knew this was inevitable) so i'm just gonna try and do a quick run through!!

greasygrimygopherguts Gilly Goyle is the most relevant!!! Same house same year!!! She's not very smart and I feel like sometimes they just talk at each other and they're just on completely different wavelengths the entire time. But she's blindly loyal and would definitely kill for him if she got even the vaguest idea that that's what he wanted, isn't going to bother to double-check first.

chasingrivers is Chase Jordan and I think their grandma should be at the RED to bully him. Purely to bully him. Another child who will probably be on a completely different planet from Julian, nobody speaks the same language here!!!

scrooged Ebenezer Smith might not have a HUGE amount of overlap, but like what if I bothered you with him anyway. He's a prickly little weeb so I'm sorry if that does happen.

AND newest baby Freddie Weasley here. He's full of bad ideas and thinks it's hilarious every time Julian offends someone with his bluntness.

HI I LOVE YOU I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE!!!

HIIIIII! ♥ hey you're just maximizing potential, this is a valid strategy. you've done well here.

you don't have to talk TO people when you already know that you like one another and are never going to be able to escape each other. it's FINE. communication is difficult. and julian is also an idiot who will often look at things being said to him with no expression other than ????

julian goes to work solely to be bullied. every person in that place tells him what to do all day. he has no control over his own life. please yell at him all day, grandma jordan.

i mean. i am. how do you say? not. opposed. yes! i am not opposed to this as a thing. also my GOD ebenezer, you're living the dream you absolute disaster. who doesn't think of trying to pull that kind of shit at least once in high school? great job. you're a hero.

and freddie i love you. you shouldn't encourage julian to be an asshole. but also julian absolutely found everything he did pretty fucking amusing (so long as it didn't personally inconvenience him) would he have expressed this verbally in any way? no. but he would have laughed very quietly to himself as shit went down.

Hi Jackie, I'm Emily! I just have one here and I doubt they'd know each other yet due to Age Gap. At most Corrie would remember him as that enormous bloke from the common room. Maybe she mistook him for a professor her first year. But I think he looks like a really cool character, and am always up for random interaction. :)

I'm Jackie!!! It's Colleen 😈

This is Sian Fletcher, she's my only character right now. She is a 20 year old former Slytherin with some notoriety for being a scammer like her dear ol' grandda, Mundungus. She's also very Welsh.

UNFORTUNATELY, I don't think they'll start off with much knowledge of each other but that will NOT prevent Sian from finding ways to annoy Julian, I am sure.

hello and nice to meet you!

yeah he absolutely suffered from 'this child looks like a grown-ass man syndrome' and ALSO suffered from 'i don't know how to correct people, so we're going with this syndrome' - so he 110% would've just pretended to be a professor. because he's an absolute idiot. sorry corrie. he's a liar. but, yes i'm sure we'll run into each other!

HELLO! 💕 i have missed writing with you~

good for her, get what you (don't) deserve the world is your oyster, you sweet little monster. and she is MORE than welcome to annoy him. but i genuinely think he finds people being shitty amusing, so i'm not sure where this will go.

lmao thank you for ignoring that I tried to steal your identity in my first comment. I miss writing with you toooo ♥️

Yesss!!! Encourage her rotten behavior!!!

Also, I am working on a Lilika reskin, so you can anticipate her harassing Julian based purely on the fact that he is very big and surly.

nah, i don't need that. i've got others. probably? i don't know what they are but we're on a journey to find out now!

look, people being utter shits is very funny as long as he gets to observe and not participate.

she will utterly dominate him, he's a disaster internally.

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